Photo by Zak di Zakcomics
We often wear masks in our daily lives. Someone might be quite playful in daily life, but they are forced to become mature in their job. They have to become someone they are not due to their job. This similar situation occurs in other interacts with other people. Someone might act different on a first date than they do with a spouse they have been with for years. They act in a different way because they don’t want to scare off someone. We act a different way in different situations, but this can be used to our advantage.
Out of a comfort zone
We pretend to be someone else when we are out of our comfort zone. We aren’t completely comfortable on a first date or in our jobs. This also applies to other social situations. If you are making a speech then you are surely out of your comfort zone. If you are in a job interview then you are out of your comfort zone. You are most likely lacking the confidence in these situations. The confidence that is lacking makes putting on a mask easier. You aren’t confident so you are trying to be someone you aren’t. You don’t have to be awkward in these situations because you are able to act confident even when you aren’t feeling confident at all.
Make your own confidence
You don’t have to feel awkward in uncomfortable situations. You are able to put on a different kind of mask to make others believe you are confident. Do you know what confidence looks like?
Stand straight and tall: Appearing to be larger than you feel will help make you feel more confident.
Smile: You can fool others that you are comfortable, and slowly the smile will become real.
Make eye contact: This is a good judge if someone is confident or not, because most unconfident people would be looking at the ground.
Think positively: This will help you start to feel the confidence, because you will be focusing on the positive rather than the negative. You focus on how the audience will love your speech rather than worrying about sounding horrible.
Speak up: You don’t mumble when you are sure about someone. You don’t come across as confident if you aren’t able to be heard. Speak loud even if you don’t want to be heard because you are embarrassed.
Continue to act as if you were confident. Copy the people around you that seem confident. Examine how people act when you view them as confident. Do they do anything that you admire? How can you tell when someone is confident? Can you copy these actions?
Act it out until you feel it
The nice thing about acting confident is that you will begin to feel real confidence. You are confident, so you can feel more comfortable in the situation. You do good job acting then you won’t need to worry about what others are thinking of you. You can feel less awkward the better at you getting with acting. I know that I am more confident in the middle of speech because I know that I can do it by then. If you have to start a speech by acting confident, then go ahead. Act as much as you need, but the nice part is the more you act the less you need to act. You begin to go with the flow of things and find out that the situation isn’t as bad as you imagined. At first it will be hard to act confident, but as you begin to go through the motions you will become more successful. Things start rough, but soon habits will form and things become easier.
You can use deception to your advantage in these ways. You can act the way that you want to be seen. If you want to be seen as a confident and friendly person, then act that way until it comes natural. You don’t have to have confidence to be confident, and that is the beauty of it. You just have to be a good actor, which if you are normal then you have had practice in job interviews and first dates. So, how do you want to be seen by other people? Do you want to be seen as cool and calm in the most stressed situations, then go ahead and go through the gestures and actions that you think would be considered calm and cool. You could be scared stiff inside, but just focus on your actions. Your actions in these situations will make your habits that become your personality. Have fun with it.